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This is a cross-over piece, Enjoy! 

Artwork by "justnab1000"

“RERISTANCE RIS RUTILE”

By Thomas E. Hartman

"Based upon characters created by Hanna-Barbera Productions and Star
Trek and its various spin-offs created by Gene Roddenberry, Rick
Berman, Michael Piller, and Jeri Taylor. Star Trek is a trademark of
Paramount Pictures."

Ship description and Crew Complement:

U.S.S. Takamomto NCC 91369, Aquarius Class (similar in appearance to the Enterprise NCC 1701E, only slightly smaller, built Earth Station McKinley on Stardate 48105.2, crew complement 455, 20 decks, 3 transporter rooms, 2 holodecks, maximum speed warp 9.965, equipped with Emergency Medical Hologram (EMH) Mark 1 as ship’s physician.

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Bridge Crew:

Captain Fredrick Jones, commanding officer of the Takamomto. First starship command. Served with Kathryn Janeway on the USS Billings before assuming command of the Takamomto

Commander T’Vel (Velma) Science Officer and First Officer. Half Vulcan and half Bajoran. Her mother (T’Pul) was a Vulcan mercenary involved in the Bajoran resistance to the Cardassian occupation of Bajor where she fell in love with a Bajoran male by the name of Pallran, who would become T’Vel’s father. When T’Vel was eleven years old her parents was arrested in a foiled attempt to blow up a Cardassian garrison on Bajor. Pallran was executed by the Cardassians, while T’Pul was taken to Terok Nor (which would become Deep Space Nine) where she was brutalized by the station’s commander, one Gul Dukat. T’Vel managed to escape and returned to Vulcan, and later would attend Starfleet Academy. T’Vel often thought about abandoning Starfleet and join the Maquis to avenge the atrocities done to her parents, but decided it wasn’t worth the risk. To this day, T’Vel is torn between Vulcan logic and Bajoran religious beliefs.

Lt. Commander Daphne Blake, ship’s counselor and communications officer. Served aboard the USS Chekhov, which was destroyed in the Borg battle at Wolf 359. She escaped, but many of her shipmates were killed or assimilated in the attack. She later served aboard the USS Sutherland (Data’s command ship during the Klingon civil war) before joining the USS Takamomto.

Lt. (JG) Norville (Shaggy) Rogers. Helmsman on the Takamomto. Lost both parents on the USS Saratoga at Wolf 359. The Takamomto is the first and only ship Norville has served on.

Ensign Scooby-Doo. Ship’s mascot, friend and companion to Norville, especially since Wolf 359. Carries official Starfleet rank of ensign.

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Other Significant Crew Members:

Lt. Debbie Marks (Debbie from “Speed Buggy”). Chief transporter operator.

Lt. Tinker Smith (Tinker on “Speed Buggy”). Engineering officer.

Lt. Reginald Barclay. Acting chief engineer on the Takamomto temporarily assigned to this ship after the loss of the Enterprise-D at Veridian III. Barclay would later be assigned to the Enterprise-E, and then to Jupiter Station, working under Dr. Louis Zimmerman.

Emergency Medical Hologram (EMH) Mark 1, a.k.a. The Doctor. Developed by Dr. Louis Zimmerman in his likeness. The EMH is being used as a full time physician on the Takamomto on an experimental basis. 



And now, on to our story…

Captain’s log, Stardate 48702.1. We are heading to Risa for some much needed R&R. We have been on the go for the last six months. First we took part in the salvage operations of the Enterprise at Veridian III. Our sympathies are with Captain Picard over the loss of his ship. After that we were in the “Badlands,” searching for the USS Voyager which disappeared without a trace in that sector of space. While there we were detained by a Cardassian ship commanded by one Gul Evek, thinking we were carrying Maquis sympathizers. We were released after we convinced him we had no such persons on board. Then to top it all off, we were placed on high alert when Thomas Riker, who had defected to the Maquis, stole the Defiant and planned to use it to attack the Cardassian Obsidian Order, which would touched off a new Federation-Cardassian war. With tensions throughout the quadrant high, with the growing Dominion threat and the ongoing Maquis crisis, we need a break…


“Well, gang, it looks like we are finally going to get some well deserved shore leave,” said Captain Fredrick Jones, the young, blond commander of the USS Takamomto. “And with all we’d been through lately, we need it.”

“Why I can hardly wait to get to Risa!” replied Lt. Commander Daphne Blake, the ship’s beautiful, red-haired counselor, who also serves as communications officer. “They have some of the best beaches in all of the Alpha Quadrant. And speaking of beaches, I have something to show you once we get there, especially you, Captain!” With that, she reached behind a console and pulled out a purple two-piece swimsuit and held it up against her body. 

“Hubba Hubba!” exclaimed the Captain.

“Like double Hubba Hubba!” said Lt. Norville “Shaggy” Rogers, the ship’s navigator. “And you know the best thing about Risa besides beaches and bikinis? They have some of the best food in the galaxy!”

“Reah, rood,” responded Ensign Scooby-Doo, the ship’s Great Dane mascot.

“I knew you would say that,” relied T’Vel the half Vulcan, half Bajoran female science officer. “But I admit I am looking forward to having some of their pomeek soup and hasperat. The food on Risa is prepared fresh and is not replicated”

“Like, hasperat is a traditional Bajoran dish, isn’t it?” asked Shaggy.

“Correct,” answered T’Vel. “I am half Bajoran. And the thing that I find fascinating about humans is they are unable to tolerate looking at each other in the nude, yet they like to show off as much skin in public as possible without showing their ‘private parts,’ especially females. That totally defies logic,” referring to the purple bikini Daphne continued to wave around.

“Ah, don’t be such a prude,” laughed Daphne. “If you got it, show it!” With that, she did a little “bump and grind” dance, causing T’Vel to raise her eyebrows ever so slightly. It was about then that T’Vel noticed a blip on her long range sensors. “Jinkies,” she said.

“Like, zoinks!” cried Shaggy. “Every time she says that word, something bad happens,” to which Scooby responded, “Reah!”

“Report!” snapped Fred.

“Long range sensors are indicating a transwarp signature about four light years from our position,” responded T’Vel. After a beat she added, “It is the Borg.” That last comment sent shivers up everyone spines. Shaggy and Scooby dived under a console.

“DAMN!” cried Fred, banging his fist against the arm of his chair in frustration. “As if Starfleet doesn’t have enough going on right now, what with the Dominion and the Maquis. That’s all we need!” Then noticing Shaggy and Scooby hiding under the console he added, “You two come out from under there! Perhaps you’d like to spend the rest of your tour in the brig for abandoning your post.” Shaggy and Scooby shook their heads. “Well then, man your stations! Commander Blake, send a secure transmission to Starfleet Command. Tell them we have uninvited Borg guests. T’Vel, update on the Borg ship.”

“It is on a course paralleling ours,” the Vulcan/Bajoran female replied. Then she said, “Correction. They have changed course and are now heading straight for us. We have been detected.”

“Red alert!” exclaimed Fred. A klaxon sounded, and the bridge lights dimmed. “All hands, general quarters. Man your battle stations and prepare to engage the Borg. Raise shields! Ready weapons. Weapons and shields on random rotating modulation. Computer, activate the EHM program, authorization Jones Omega-Six, and have him report to me when activated.”

“Must you activate that thing?” asked Daphne. He’s errr, it’s so pompous and arrogant, like his creator, which I unfortunately know.”

“You have a better idea, Commander?” replied Fred, a hint of irritation in his voice. “Could you graduate Starfleet medical school in the next three minutes?” Regretting what he’d just said, he then added, “I’m sorry, Daphne. I didn’t mean it. Hey, I don’t like those things either, but that’s all we got.”

“Apology accepted,” said Daphne. “By the way, I have a couple of messages from Starfleet. Commander Sisko’s aboard the Defiant, leading a task force from DS9. And Admiral Nechayev and Borg specialist Captain Elizabeth Shelby is heading up another armanda departing Starbase 165. But...it’ll take them at least ninety minutes to reach our position.”

“I don’t think we have ninety minutes,” Fred told her. Right then, the captain’s comm badge chirped. “Sickbay to the Captain,” came the voice to which Fred responded, “Jones here. Go ahead.”

“I am the Emergency Medical Hologram, but you can call me the Doctor,” the voice said again. “Please state the nature of the medical emergency.”

“None yet,” Fred told the EMH, “but expect multiple casualties shortly. We’re about to engage the Borg. Some of your patients may be partially assimilated.”

“My goodness,” said the Doctor. “But you’ll be happy to know that I can treat any injury or disease, even Borg assimilation. We’ll be ready down here. EMH out.” No sooner than the Doctor ended his report did T’Vel exclaim, “JINKIES!” Everyone turned and on the viewscreen, there it was, a huge cube shaped monstrosity, followed by the last words many space travelers heard upon encountering this kind of vessel:

“We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.”

“Report!” cried Fred.

“They are scanning us,” said T’Vel. Then came a soft WHAM! not unlike the sound of train cars being coupled. “They have us in a tractor beam,” she added.

“That’s what they think!” the Captain said. “All weapons, fire at will! Take out that beam emitter, as well as their weapons and propulsion systems. Let’s do as much damage as we can.” With that the Takamomto unleashed an incandescent hail of photon torpedoes and blistering phaser fire. Explosions erupted on the Borg cube’s surface. The Takamomto had just unleashed yet another volley when a green tinged beam sprang from the cube and struck the Takamomto head on. On the bridge, everyone was thrown off their feet or out of their chairs by the impact. Daphne’s console exploded in a fountain of sparks, but she escaped injury by diving for cover just in time. Still, her uniform was smeared with soot, burn holes were evident, and her hair was singed. “My hair!” she cried. “My beautiful hair! I’ll make those drones pay for what they did to my hair!”

“T’Vel,” Fred shouted, scrambling back to his feet. “Damage report!”

T’Vel began, “We were hit by a polarized tetryon beam. Warp power and weapons are offline. Impulse power is functional. Shields are at 34%. And there is a hull breach on Deck 12. Emergency force fields are holding.”

“Damage to the Borg?”

“Their weapons and propulsion systems are offline. And we have destroyed their tractor beam emitter. Damage to their other systems is unknown.”

“Thank you.” Fred slapped his comm badge. “Bridge to Tinker. Status of weapons systems.” 

“Tinker here. Golliee, they fried our primary fire-control systems, but we are switching to auxiliary backup. I’ll have full firepower available to you momentarily.” 

“Good man. Captain out.” Fred slapped his badge again. “Bridge to Barclay. Status of propulsion systems.”

“Uh, Reginald Barclay here.”

“Report.”

“Uh, we lost warp drive. They toasted the magnetic couplings, and knocked the dilithium crystals out of alignment. Nothing major, though. I can, uh give you warp drive in about forty-five minutes. And, uh, I’ve got a crew working on that hull breach on Deck 12.”

“If you can give me warp in anything less than forty-five minutes, that would be greatly appreciated. Keep working on it. Bridge out.” It was right about then that T’Vel shouted a warning in un-Vulcan like alarm: “JINKIES, THEY ARE BEAMING THROUGH OUR SHIELDS!” A moment later, two Borg drones appeared on the bridge. Everyone grabbed their phaser side arms and began firing, but to no avail. “JINKIES, THEY HAVE ADAPTED!” T’Vel cried. Through all of this, Shaggy and Scooby sought refuge under the same console they hid under earlier. One of the drones reached under the console, grabbed Scooby, pulled back on his neck, and a pair of assimilation tubules pierced his neck, not unlike those of a vampire. Scooby fell limp, and then the canine and the two drones vanished. For a long time, no one spoke, just staring at each other in disbelief. Finally, Fred broke the silence. “I can’t believe what just happened here!” he exclaimed.

“Jeepers, I don’t get it,” Daphne said. “Why would the Borg want to assimilate a dog?”

“We’re dealing with the Borg here, Daphne,” Fred told her. “It must be part of some insidious plan.”

“So, like, what are we going to do?” Shaggy asked.

“I’ll tell you what we’re going to do,” Fred said. “You and T’Vel will lead an away rescue mission. Take a team of security personnel with you. No crew member of mine is going to be a Borg if I can help it!” Fred slapped his comm badge again. “Bridge to Transporter Room One.”

“Lt. Marks, here.”

“Deb, I need to beam an away team on board that Borg cube. Can you do it?”

“You’re joking!” Deb responded. Then after a beat she replied, “Sure, piece of cake. There’s a spot near where you destroyed their tractor beam emitter where their shields are down. I can beam them on board there, and then do a site to site to anywhere on the cube.”

“Excellent. The bridge will provide you with the site to site coordinates. Captain out.” Turning to Daphne Fred then asked her, “Commander, I know you’re our communications officer and counselor. But do you know how to run the sensors?”

“Sure,” Daphne said. “Sensor Array Operations and Theory is an required course at the Academy.”

“Good. Scan for Scooby’s lifesigns. Send the coordinates to Deb in the Transporter Room. Lt. Rogers, you and T’Vel report to Transporter Room One immediately.” He returned to his command chair and sat down, and then muttered, “God, I hope this works.”

ABOARD THE BORG CUBE

Scooby was led down a corridor near the center of the Borg ship by the two drones that had abducted him. Though assimilated, he had enough of his canine nature left to know he didn’t like it one bit. He was scared and confused. Suddenly, the two Borg stopped, let go of him, and went into nearby alcoves, where they appeared to go to sleep. Regenerating, Scooby thought. Then he heard a familiar voice: “Scooby-Doo, I have come for you.”

“Rooby-Ree, rats rou?” Scooby said to the mysterious voice.

“Yes, I am the one once known as Scooby-Dee before I was assimilated,” the voice said. A snow white Great Dame appeared, but this dog was a full fledged Borg! “But now I am the one who is many. I am also the Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix K-Nine.”

“Rhat?” Scooby exclaimed. “Rut Ree, rince rid the Rorg rart rasimilating rogs?” 

“I wish you would address me by my Borg designation, which is ‘K of Nine’, but you may call me ‘K’ if you like,” the canine Borg formerly known as Scooby-Dee said. “And why did the Borg start assimilating dogs? I will tell you. Two and a half of your years ago, we tried to assimilate Sector 001. That plan failed, but we noticed that humans, Species 5618 to us, had a curious attachment to domesticated lower life forms, what they refer to as animals. They called these animals ‘pets.’ Pets are irrelevant to the Borg. But we noticed that these pets sometimes bit and nipped at their human masters. So we thought, why not assimilate some of these animals and turn them loose on Earth? One would bite a human, assimilating it. Then this newly assimilated human would go around assimilating other humans. Meanwhile, more animals would bite other humans, creating still more drones. And in no time at all the Earth would become Borg! And by the way, we plan to do the same thing to the Klingons, using some of their targs. And once the two dominant powers in the Alpha and Beta Quadrants had been Borgified, the rest will be what you would call ‘easy pickings’ for us. The Romulans, the Vulcans, the Andorians, the Cardassians, even the Ferengi would all quickly become Borg. And soon after that, we would rule the galaxy!”

“Rou rount ret aray rith ris,‘Ray,’” the partially assimilated Scooby said. 

“I already have, ‘Rocutus!’” said K of Nine gleefully, then adding, “’Rocutus of Scoob.’ That is your new Borg designation. It has a nice ‘ring’ to it. Drones, take him to the assimilation chamber!” The same two drones that brought Scooby here awakened, grabbed him, and started dragging him away. “Rooooo…!” Scooby cried.

MEANWHILE NEARBY ON THE BORG SHIP

Lt. Rogers, T’Vel, and their team of N.D. security personnel were slowly making their way toward the center of the cube. All carried phaser rifles and tricorders. They encountered thousands upon thousands of Borg drones, most of them regenerating in their alcoves. Once in a while, they would encounter a drone or two moving about. When they did, T’Vel would advise, “Do not make any false moves. If they do not perceive us as a threat, they will ignore us,” which they did. All of a sudden, T’Vel exclaimed, “By the Prophets of Bajor!” Shaggy wondered what was up. He had never heard T’Vel use any exclamation other than “jinkies,” “fascinating,” or “curious.” This must be serious, Shaggy thought.

“Over here,” T’Vel called. The sight that met their eyes astonished them. The whole area resembled a giant kennel, but all the dogs contained within were Borg! There were assimilated Great Dames, Collies, German Shepherds, and even a few poodles. They were all silent, not barking, not behaving like ordinary canines. T’Vel counted sixty-nine such creatures. Just then, one of the N.D. security officers called, “You all better have a look at this.” They saw another kennel area, but this one was filled with strange alien animals. “What are those creatures?” Shaggy asked.

“They are targs, native to Qo’noS, the Klingon homeworld,” T’Vel replied. “Now I am really concerned. Why are the Borg assimilating animals?” 

“I’d wish they assimilate tribbles,” Shaggy said, to which T’Vel answered, “Indeed.”

BACK ON THE TAKAMOMTO

“I wish the away team would contact us,” Daphne said, standing at the comm station. “It’s been a while.” At that moment, Fred’s comm badge chirped. “Away team to bridge,” T’Vel voice said.

“Report,” Fred replied. 

“We have found something very strange going on over here. They have been assimilating numerous animals. I have counted sixty-nine canines and forty-eight targs that had been assimilated.”

“Any sign of Scooby?”

“Checking…I have located him. He is approximately forty meters from our position.”

“Well, grab him and get him back here. And above all…be careful. Jones out”

“This getting weirder by the minute,” Daphne said. Just them the comm panel beeped. “Captain, the Borg are hailing us!”

“On screen,” snapped Fred. And the sight that greeted them on the viewscreen shocked everyone on the bridge. “Dear Lord…” Fred muttered. “My God in heaven...!” Daphne cried.

“Ri am Rocutus of Scoob. Rou rill rease rour rostilities roward rus rand rescort rus ro Rector rero rero one. Rif rou ro rot comply, re rill restroy rou. Rou rill radapt ro service rus. Reristance ris rutile.”

“Oh my God, it’s Wolf 359 all over again!” Daphne shrieked. “Hold me, Freddy, I don’t know how much more of this I can take.” Fred went over to Daphne and held her tight. “Don’t worry, I have confidence in our away team. They’ll bring Scooby back in one piece.” Daphne laid her head on Fred’s shoulder and began sobbing softly. Right then, Fred’s comm badge chirped.

“Uh, Lt. Barclay to bridge,’ came the voice of the acting chief engineer.

“Jones, here, Barclay. Report.”

“Uh, warp drive has been restored, sir.”

“That’s the best news I’d heard today, Good work, Barclay, you’ve earned your pay for the week. Jones out.”

“Y-you think our (sniff) fortunes are turning?” Daphne asked her Captain.

“I hope so, Daphne,” Fred said to her. “I sure hope so.”

BACK ON THE BORG SHIP

T’Vel, Shaggy, and their security team continued to make their way towards where their tricorders indicated Scooby would be. The Borg remained inactive. The group turned a corner, and lo and behold, there he was! “Jinkies,” whispered T’Vel.

“Like, zoinks, he is a Borg!” Shaggy also whispered. “I knew it, I knew it.”

“That is why I came prepared,” T’Vel said. She reached in her Starfleet field pack, which is not unlike a handbag, and produced a hypospray. “The tricordrazine contained in this hypospray will render Scooby incapable of offering any resistance,” she added. “Cover me, I will sneak up on him, give the injection, and grab him. Be prepared for an emergency beam out.” With that, T’Vel approached the assimilated Scooby from behind, held the hypospray to his neck, and injected him with the tricordrazine. No sooner than she did that then the group began to hear the sounds of mechanical whining and whirring. The Borg was reactivating! “Zoinks, like the natives are becoming restless tonight!” Shaggy cried.

“Open fire!” T’Vel ordered. “I do not know how many shots we will be able to get off, but that should buy us a few seconds.” With that, everyone except the Vulcan/Bajoran woman began firing on the approaching Borg. She tapped her badge. “Away team to the Captain!”

“Jones, here,” came the response. “Report.”

“We have recovered Scooby, but we are encountering heavy Borg resistance. We need an emergency beam out, NOW!” 

“Understood,” came Fred’s reply. “Jones out.” The group continued to fire on the approaching drones. So far, their fire was effective. Whenever the phaser fire hit a Borg, it would collapse to the deck, emitting a shower of sparks. But everyone knew what was coming next, and soon enough, one of the security ND’s cried, “They’ve adapted!”

“HAAAALLLLLPPPPP!” screamed Shaggy. T’Vel turned in the direction of her crewmate’s cries, and what she saw horrified her. A drone had Shaggy pinned against a beam and was trying to assimilate him! Only by squirming did he avoid the assimilation tubules. T’Vel let go of the unconscious Scooby, grabbed her phaser rifle, held it over her head, then hit the drone over the head with the butt of the rifle. She swung again, this time hitting the Borg in the mid-section. The drone fell to the deck, sparking.

“Whew, thanks,” said a grateful Shaggy. “Like, I thought I was a goner for sure.”

“Your very welcome, Lieutenant,” T’Vel said. About that time her comm badge chirped. “Lt. Marks to away team. I have a lock on your signal. Prepare for beam out. I’ll have to beam you out the way you came in. Stand by.”

“Thanks, Deb,” T’Vel told her. “Away team out.” She went over and retrieved Scooby, then asked, “Shaggy, give me your phaser rifle.”

“Why?” Shaggy asked.

“I just want to give our Borg ‘friends’ a little, as you say, ‘parting gift.’” She took the rifle and made a few adjustments to it. It began to whine softly. “What did you do?” Shaggy said.

“I have set the phaser to overload,” T’Vel told him. “It will detonate in approximately sixty seconds, destroying this entire area. Hey, Borg, assimilate THIS!” The whining sound was getting louder by the second. Right then T’Vel, Shaggy, Scooby, and the security crew shimmered into thin air, leaving behind T’Vel’s little surprise.

BACK ON BOARD THE TOKAMOMTO

Captain Jones and Commander Blake could only watch and wait. T’Vel’s announcement that they had retrieved Scooby had lifted their spirits considerably. Then came Deb’s announcement over the comm: “Away team’s back on board.” “Yippee!” Daphne cheered.

“I would not celebrate just yet,” T’Vel told her over the link. “Scooby has been assimilated.” Just then the sensor console beeped. “Captain, sensors have just picked up an explosion near the center of the cube,” Daphne reported. “Consistent with a phaser overload.”

“I just wanted to prove to the Borg that ‘resistance is not always futile,’” T’Vel said. She then added, “ I will signal the Doctor to expect an assimilated patient. We are taking Scooby directly to sickbay.”

“We’ll meet you there,” Fred told her. “Out. Lieutenant, you have the bridge, “ he told Michael Barbera, the young man manning Ops. He left his station and sat down in the command chair.

MOMENTS LATER IN SICKBAY

The gang gathered in sickbay. The Doctor, Ensign Joe Piller, the Doctor’s assistant, and Nurse Alyssa Ogawa, temporarily assigned to the Takamomto since the loss of the Enterprise, were finishing up treating the injured crewmembers from when the Borg particle beam struck the ship. The Doctor came over, took one look at the assimilated dog, and rolled his eyes in disgust. “Deassimilate this dog,” Fred told the hologram.

“You’ve got to be joking!” the Doctor responded. “That’s not part of my programming. I’m a doctor, not a veterinarian.”

“You will operate on him,” Fred told him. “That’s a direct order, Doctor.”

“Sheesh,” the Doctor muttered.

“Objection duly noted and logged. How long, Doctor?”

The Doctor pondered for a moment. “I can have him as good as new, singing and dancing in about thirty minutes.”

“You’ve got twenty minutes, Doctor. Send him up to the bridge when you are done. You have your orders.”

“Jeepers, Captain, I can’t stand the thought of Scooby singing,” Daphne said as the gang exited sickbay and made their way to the turbolift. “His singing voice is so grating…it’s like chalk scraping on a blackboard.”

“Singing…” Fred wondered. “That’s it! Scooby’s singing is going to be our ticket out this Borg mess! If we could get him to sing to the Borg, his voice would overload their central nexus…”

“Which would destroy their ship!” T’Vel picked up the thought. “Quite logical.”

“That’s why they pay me the Captain’s money,” Fred said. The gang entered the turbolift. “Bridge.”

EIGHTEEN MINUTES LATER

The gang was waiting on the Bridge when Scooby, returned to normal, stepped onto the bridge. Everyone cheered.

“T’Vel, hail the Borg,” Fred told his science officer. “Scooby, would you like to sing to our Borg friends?”

“Ring?” 

“Don’t ask questions, Scooby. Just do it. That’s an order.” Right then, T’Vel said, “I have the Borg.”

“On screen,” Fred snapped. The image of K of Nine appeared. “What have you done to my drone?” she demanded. “I’ll destroy you, I’ll destroy you all!”

“Scooby, you’re on!” 

Scooby began:

“ Scoobby-doobby doo reams Ri Rove Rou, Scoobby-doobby, Scoobby-doobby, Scoobby-doobby doobby doobby doobby doo!”

And then sang this line:

“Rersistance ris rutile!”

“ARRGGGHHH!” the image on the viewscreen cried. Then she lit up like a flash bulb and fell to the deck, writhing and sparking,

“T’Vel,” Fred exclaimed. “Report!”

T’Vel checked her console. “It is working. I am reading power fluctuations, internal explosions…Sir, their ship is going to detonate!”

“Shaggy, maximum warp!” Fred ordered. “I want to be a safe distance away when that cube finally blows up." The Takamomto sprang into warp, leaving the doomed Borg ship in its wake. Seconds later, the cube erupted into a green-white fireball, leaving nothing behind but a superheated gas cloud and spinning debris.

“All stop,” Fred ordered. “T’Vel, scan for lifesigns.”

“Scanning. All of the Borg have been destroyed, sir.” By now a celebration had broken out on the bridge. Daphne was doing her little bump and grind dance again singing, “We’re bad, we’re bad…!” She stopped and said, “Scooby, you did it! You defeated the Borg!”

“Rah rucks, rit was ruthing…”

RISA

Captain’s log, Stardate 48705.4. We have finally arrived at Risa and enjoying some well earned shore leave. Admiral Alynna Nechayev has recommended the entire crew for commendation, and has personally recommended that Ensign Scooby-Doo receive the James T. Kirk Award for Valor under Fire. I will also personally grant Scooby-Doo a field promotion to the rank of Lieutenant.

“Come on, Captain, do you wanna hang ten with me?” Daphne called to her commanding officer. She stood at the edge of the waves, wearing the same purple bikini she had shown off on the bridge just before the Borg attack. She was also holding a surfboard.

“I’d love too,” Fred replied. He grabbed a surfboard, joined his red haired junior officer in the water, and together paddled out to meet the advancing waves. “By the way, since we’re no longer on the ship, you can call me Freddy. And that’s an order…Daphne.”

“Aye, aye, Freddy,” Daphne said, giggling. And together, they proceeded to “shoot the curl.”

Meanwhile, T’Vel, Lt. Shaggy Rogers, and soon to be Lt. Scooby Doo was hanging out at the food concession. T’Vel was enjoying some pomeek soup, while Shaggy and Scooby was debating whether or not they should order some hasperat.

“I believe you will enjoy hasperat,” T’Vel said to her shipmate friends. “Think of it as a Bajoran burrito. As they say, ‘Try it, you’ll like it.’”

“I think I will,” Shaggy said. A few moments later, a waiter appeared with Shaggy’s hasperat. “Like, it looks delicious.” With that Shaggy began to dig in, but Scooby tried to take the Bajoran dish away from him. Shaggy swiped the hasperat out of Scooby’s reach just in time and shot Scooby a dirty look.

“Not so fast, Scooby,” T’Vel laughed (very un-Vulcan like emotion for her). “I have something even better than hasperat for you.” She reached into her field pack and produced a jumbo box of Scooby Snacks! “The Captain asked me to give you this, for your bravery, standing up to the Borg the way you did. And it is just for you.” 

“Rust for re?” Scooby asked. “Rah, rucks. Scooby-Dooby-Doo!”

THE END

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